Wanted: Bathtub Exorcist

Our bathtub never really excelled in draining water. It was always a bit slow, but we tried to remedy that with a trap to fit over the drain and occasionally using a jug of 10 Minute Draino. Then one day the bathtub drain gave up. The shower water wasn't going anywhere.

We first took to the drain with a manual snake auger, and while it pulled up some hideous stuff, the water was still pooling in the tub. Then, Sam grabbed the plunger. Out shot black evil crud out of the drain, which reminded us of the projectile vomit by the possessed girl in the "Exorcist." It was horrible.


Still, no luck. That meant bathing was to take place in the kitchen sink, temporarily or indefinitely, depending on what help we could get from the professionals.

The first guy who showed up at the house was armed to clean all of the crap from the drain. What he soon discovered was a bit of history hidden by a recently installed tub-surround. Now, tub-surrounds can be a convenient option - you just stick the whole unit in the bathroom, and presto! for not a whole lot of money you have a whole fiberglass tub/shower that is easy to maintain. We're really not in love with the tub-surround the previous owner chose. It's a purple-grey faux marble that clashes with the wonderfully vintage green tile. But, more importantly, when they installed the tub-surround, they never bothered to update the pipes. The vintage green tile goes with the vintage water trap behind the tub. We were told to call another plumber.

Day two of a kitchen-sink bath.
The second plumber, who we begged to come over, got the heads up on the water trap. He told us that these things date back 70, 80, 100 years ago, and it's now illegal to put in residential buildings. He also said that the only way to get the trap cover off is with C-4. Ha! Maybe he didn't read the rules of the house, but no one is allowed to use explosives inside, unless s/he is a representative of BAM. The plumber grumbled the whole time he replaced the water trap and installed a new section of pipe. When that was fixed, our hopeful selves asked if we could finally use the tub. Nope. He was a plumber, not a drain cleaner. Are you KIDDING me? Besides, he didn't bring an electric auger.

The third guy, in a flash, came to the house, finished cleaning the pipes, and literally ran out of the house. Sam had to chase after him, because he didn't reinstall the drain. Hurriedly, he screwed it into the drain hole, and took off. Ok, that's simple enough, but what about this ball of plumbers putty? Sam consulted our trusty DIY Homeowners book, and the editors are big fans of using the plumbers putty.

After redoing the drain job and scrubbing off the dried-up evil black vomit in the tub, we turned on the water. HALLELUJAH. The water is going down that drain in a lovely tornado! No more kitchen baths! No more getting odd looks at work because of our disheveled and greasy appearances!

So, after all of that, when we were fresh and clean, we mused about how much we appreciate the plumbers and drain cleaners that deal with shit and make our lives comfortable. We heart you plumbers.

Before & After

Finally! Some hotly anticipated before and after pictures.

Dining Room
Before

After



Kitchen
Before

After (TA DA!!!)



Thanks to Mom Franklin for helping me sew those curtains (made from material from the apartment curtains and leftover fabric from a quilter friend)

BAM's Holidazzle

Disgusting Scat

Remember the original mail slot? First, it was too small for standard size envelopes and magazines. Second, our bird friend left his scat all over the slot cover, making it a health hazard for the mail carrier and us. After we attached the new mailbox, covering up the mail slot, we thought our problems were solved. Our mail was intact and the box was safe to handle.

Then this happened:


Our bird friend came back and let 'er rip all over the new mailbox. Day after day he would perch and shamelessly drop his load. Does he think no one wouldn't notice?


Even though he was a cute little shitter, he had to go - and we didn't want to employ an exterminator, poison, or a BB gun. The most PETA friendly option was to put up plant netting, and even though it looks a little odd, no more scat!

In Love

We have an apple tree! We didn't know we had an apple tree, until one day APPLES showed up! Glorious red-green apples!

They have a sweet, tart, crisp bite - pretty good for eating right off of the stem. But, they are DELICIOUS baked. Smother them in raisins, butter, and brown sugar OR bake them under a pile of old fashioned oats, butter, brown sugar and cinnamon ... and serve with vanilla ice cream/custard. OH MY GOODNESS.

I am totally in love with our apple tree.

We're BACK!

I KNOW - it's been almost two months since the last H of B post. Can you blame us? We've been busy trying to maintain a normal-ish life and reacquaint ourselves to friends and society, while living in a fixer-upper that can make the well-intentioned owners freak out (Becky) or shut down (Sam).
Impressively, we are still married, still speaking with each other, and we still have all of our digits in tact.

So, how much did we finish on our wish list from June?
To-Do "Immediately"
all items scratched out either A) will never be completed or B) haven't been completed, YET

1) Bedroom: paint ceiling, walls, trim, closet, doors; make bought curtains.
2) Other bedroom: paint ceiling, walls, trim, closet; install new lighting; make bought curtains; create new artwork hang artwork we already own.
3) Bathroom: scrape popcorn off bathroom ceiling wait for more ceiling to fall into the tub while showering before finally deciding to scrape the popcorn; paint walls; replace medicine cabinet; install shelving; make curtains.
4) Dining room: paint ceiling, walls, trim, china cabinets inside & out; install new lighting; make bought curtains.
5) Living room: paint ceiling, walls, trim; add additional shelving to book case; ask Dad Franklin to make a table for entryway (see pictures in future post); clean fireplace; put heavy boxes in front of fireplace so that the squirrel/bat/gremlin stuck in the chimney does not escape into the house; make bought curtains; create new artwork for space hang artwork we already own.
6) Entry way: paint closet, walls, ceiling, trim; tear off vinyl & replace with ceramic tile.
7) Hallway: paint closets, walls, trim, ceiling.
8) Kitchen: rip off wallpaper; install appliances; install counter top & sink; strip cabinets; paint cabinets inside & out; attach hardware; add shelving in cabinets; paint trim, walls; install new lighting.*
9) Upstairs Half-Story: replace ceiling tile; paint walls; make curtains; paint powder room; replace toilet seat.
10) Basement: install dryer; remove leaky cement sink; install new utility sink; install shelving & storage
11) Outside: install mailbox; trim back large shrubs; mow the lawn

*There is NO WAY that we would have been able to get the kitchen in any kind of order by ourselves. Lucky for us, our friend and former Uptown neighbor Dan Hanson is the owner of Hanson Building and Remodeling - he saved our butts.

Overall, we are pleased with our progress, especially after looking back at the photos on this blog. Can you believe that kitchen?!

What to stick in the hole?

Now, we have a patio, we have stone steps ... the dilapidated grill just has to go.
All it really took was a few whacks with a sledge hammer to separate it from the tube in the ground that contained the gas line.

Don't worry - the gas was capped weeks ago!

After that was done, the first thought was, what to stick in the hole?

Three choices: corn, bamboo shoots, enchilada sauce.

Corn doesn't work.

Enchilada sauce wins!

Add some dirt, and...what hole?